Whether you have biological sisters, spiritual sisters, or friends that have turned into sisters – we can all agree that the bond shared between sisters is special or at least it should be.
When the idea of writing a blog about sisterhood came to me, my mind immediately thought about the story of Cain and Abel (Genesis 4). I think that Abel’s murder was brutal and of course hurtful to God. It was rooted in anger, jealousy, and hatred. However, what always stands out to me about Abel’s murder was the fact that Cain responded to God “Am I my brother’s keeper?” Cain felt no responsibility whatsoever for his brother Abel.
This had me thinking that no matter their differences in personality or dedication if Cain had felt love and some form of responsibility for Abel, murder would not have taken place. I believe the bond of sisterhood is held deeply together when we believe we are our sister’s keeper. The following characteristics come to mind when I think of the ways that we can show we are our sister’s keeper:
1. Sisters Are Honest
I‘ve always loved that my sister Sash and I are only 3 years apart. Growing up with a sister close in age has been fun. There have been many laughs, happy times and of course sometimes challenges but overall it’s an experience that I’m very grateful to have. Even though we are both introverts, my personality and her personality are often like night and day. Our nicknames for each other are “Pitbull” & “Poodle.” Sash is Pitbull and I’m Poodle lol. My sister is very kindhearted and compassionate but she can also be feisty and a “tell it like it is” kind of person when it comes to sharing her thoughts/opinions. On the other hand, I can often be a “beat around the bush” kind of person.
Sash has always been smart and mature so from a young age she never held back her honesty even if it required me to toughen up to hear it. She’s been honest with me about everything from trivial things like my outfit or hairstyle to more important things like my mindset or my approach in handling a situation. Her honesty would bother me a lot (and often still does lol) because it would come off to me as rude, but after a while I would drop my pride and see that her honesty was for my benefit. Many times hearing her perspective helped me to grow as a person. Part of being your sister’s keeper is being truthful even when it’s a truth that is difficult to share. The intention behind it should always be rooted in love and wanting what’s best for her.
2. Sisters Celebrate
I think in today’s society with shows like Real Housewives and Basketball Wives, women are portrayed as being fake with one another and disloyal. However, I still believe that there are great women out there who are able to change this narrative. There are still women who choose to be faithful, truehearted and committed to their sisterhood.
When I look at the story of Mary and Elisabeth in the Bible, I love how they were both equally excited to share the good news of their upcoming births (Luke 1). They were truly happy for each other’s new blessing on the way. Mary was carrying the Messiah, Jesus and Elisabeth was carrying the waymaker of the Messiah, John. If Elisabeth had fallen into the trap of jealousy and envied the fact that it was Mary who was carrying Jesus and not her, this would have ruined a beautiful moment. It was important that they both valued the unique callings God had on their lives. I too have fallen into the trap of jealousy instead of celebrating a sister, and as you read this I’m sure you can think of occasions when you have done the same. Instead of comparing, let’s be our sister’s keeper and celebrate.
3. Sisters Empower
My grad school experience felt very much like a roller coaster ride. There were many sleepless nights and tears. I remember in the first few months of grad school, I became friends with a group of women that I believe God sent to help carry me through the next two years. We had met during the first weeks of orientation. We were all women of color at a prestigious school where it often seemed that our genuine desire to pursue public health didn’t exactly match with our peers. I remember being told by one of my deans that I was in danger of being removed from my program because I was struggling to pass statistics. The day he told me this, I literally cried on the A train from 168th street down to Penn station. I felt so stupid. I had already started practicing how I would tell everyone that I may not make it through my program. After a little while I met up with the girls and I told them what was going on.
These girls had only known me for a few months, so in my mind I felt as if they weren’t obligated to “cheer me up.” To my surprise, they encouraged me to know that I would not get kicked out of the program and I would make it through. They empowered me to keep trying and remember that I was meant to be there with them. These girls owed me nothing but they helped me push through. Whether it was by studying at one of their apartments, grabbing a quick lunch, or riding the train together home late at night. I will never forget that moment in my life and the bond of sisterhood we formed. Women who empower other women are strong and they should be cherished. Choose to be your sister’s keeper by empowering her.
What are your thoughts on sisterhood or other ways you can be your sisters keeper?
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